You’ve heard it before, right?
Women should never travel alone.
I mean, think of all of the terrible things that could happen when a girl goes out into the world all by her lonesome.
Things happen to women who go out alone. They realize things, they meet people who change their perceptions, they come home changed entirely.
Doesn’t that seem dangerous?
It’s better she avoids the whole adventure altogether. Why? I’ve got a whole laundry list of reasons right here:
⁃ She might realize she doesn’t need to depend on anyone at all anymore, other than herself.
⁃ She might feel so empowered that she decides to be her own boss and to completely turn her life around.
⁃ She will realize that the people who held her back were giving her bad advice.
⁃ She will come to find that her strong intuition is a superpower, and that traveling solo only makes it sharper.
⁃ Her confidence levels will increase to an explosively high-level, and then what will we do with her?
⁃ She’s going to find strength in places she never knew it could have existed.
⁃ She’s going to get a world-class education, and everyone knows that smart, ambitious women are dangerous to the status quo.
⁃ She’s going to stand up and make herself heard more, because she will become aware of her privilege and be a voice for all of the women who don’t have the same.
⁃ She’s going to realize that she is a whole person just on her own, and that the goal of her life doesn’t have to be finding a partner, and we can’t have that can we?
⁃ She might seek a location-independent job, and we know how dangerous giving women mobility can be!
⁃ Women who travel get that sun-kissed hair and skin, strong legs from all the walking, sharp eyes from all of the seeing, and the sharp mind from all of the learning.
⁃ Her mind will open and she will start asking more questions, and everyone knows an inquisitive mind only leads to trouble.
⁃ She’s going to realize that she is statistically safer abroad than in the United States.
⁃ She’ll be spending valuable tax dollars in other countries! The horror!
⁃ If she travels alone she’ll become self-reliant, which is too bad, because everyone knows that an independent woman is tougher to suppress and impress.
⁃ Speaking of, it’s going to become harder to impress her with a fancy car or a swanky apartment. I mean please, tell me more about your leather interior and Equinox membership, I’m hanging on every word!
⁃ Also, it’s going to be a lot harder to convince her that she needs you, because she’s well aware that she doesn’t.
⁃ Once she knows how powerful and capable she is, she’s not going to come home and accept gender pay gaps, The glass ceiling, and the lack of females, and especially female minorities, represented in media and C-level suites (because honestly, what the hell?).
⁃ She will be forever changed by what she learns about herself and her capabilities. Can you imagine a more dangerous creature?
⁃ She will not be easily controlled.
⁃ She’s going to learn that she looks absolutely fantastic without her hair done up, her make up perfect, and high heels on her feet. With all that free time to explore rather than spend in the bathroom getting ready, who knows what she might do?
⁃ She’s probably going to stop caring about designer purses, too. It’s possible she will start pursuing experiences and freedom rather than things to find happiness. And everyone knows that when women spend less time at shopping malls and more time on the street holding up signs, the patriarchy gets uncomfortable, and we’d hate to make anyone uncomfortable.
⁃ She might become ambitious. Oh dear, what about the men who don’t find an ambitious woman attractive? What about their needs?
⁃ She’ll realize the superpowers within her: Compassion, drive, resourcefulness, and incredible problem-solving ability.
⁃ She will be changed forever.
So let us keep our daughters, sisters, mothers, and girlfriends safe at home. Let’s tell them they aren’t capable of doing it, the world is too dangerous and they better not leave the front door.
It’s a dangerous business going out your front door, after all.
Ladies, what would you add?
Shelby Morrison says
Damn you just laid it all out. Mic drop! What an amazing and inspiring list. I’m even more motivated to take my first solo trip this winter. I’ll be traveling solo for a while, even though I’m married. He’s less confident in picking up and finding $ abroad. So I’ll be flying solo for a long while I think. I get scared sometimes, think I won’t be able to do it, but you’re absolutely right. It’s going to be soooo worth it! Can’t wait for all the benefits you listed and to come back a better woman each time.
Kristin says
I think that’s an amazing gift that you’re both giving by heading out solo! I still believe in traveling alone, even in committed relationships, so that you can remember who you are as one and as two. Fear is normal and even motivating. You got this!
GG says
Not a lady (a rude male!), but a big pull for me is anyone with constructive ambition (reason for the “constructive”: there are ambitious crooks too), not what is defined in society as “successful”. Not into “yes sir” people. I always wanted a female partner, not a dependent, although I think in my case I am more dependent on her, maybe too much? Like your spunk here, must be cathartic to write this! I think everyone should have the courage to shake up the status quo or society will degrade, but make sure to identify areas of true injustice and go after it, so much unfortunately is politicized or a rush to judgement hurting true causes. There still is plenty of issues hurting women unfortunately (one of them is getting better with more female doctors in all fields). Keep in mind though, women and men alike when going at it alone when traveling, even if extremely experienced at it, need to listen to their warning instincts or those of the locals. Never get complacent or arrogant: My thoughts and wishes are with Emma Kelty. You can find out more by googling “woman killed in Amazon”. Those same instincts, however need to be used whether alone, in a group, in New York City or the rain-forest, so not a shot at solo travel, it really is safer and more power to you solo female travelers, you’re awesome, just watching your back. Oh, and how about for number 26 “Oh my, she might convince other women to do the same and start a whole trend, how persuasive she can be!”?
Kristin says
I love your point #26!
Ashley says
Yes to every point! Love this.
Caitlyn Worland says
What an epic and empowering post! Right on, sister!
Angelica Cruz says
Yes to all of these! Thank you for this post!
terra @ terragoes.com says
Love this so much! Yes to each and every one!
Kristin says
<3
Heinz Guderian says
Yeah, just like Emma Kelty!
Kristin says
There will always be small minds who point to the one or two incidents per year and say that’s how it always goes for ALL women alone. It’s not a good basis for every solo female traveler out there.
I’m enraged that happened to her, but even more enraged you’re taking her name in vain like that.
So you can go shave your back now, bye Jason.
Ioanna says
Right on! 😀
Anything that’s got to do with women being happy, self-reliable, smart and independent is freaking dangerous to the world! 😀
A woman who dares to be alone and not lonely is a freak of nature to so many people… sadly.
Happy (solo) travels!
Ioanna (A Woman Afoot)
Dani says
I just turned 50! Been travelling since I was 12, first with mom, then school, then Uni mates & siblings, then got impatient with people who are too picky or unimpulsive, & went myself! All 7 continents, all 7 modern Wonders of the World & 104 countries later, I’m a mom, a lawyer, a homeowner, an international dance competitor & a girlfriend, & proved everybody wrong that “once you have kids you’ll never travel again”.
Kristin says
That’s so awesome Dani! So powerful too. Proof there is no singular path.
Diane says
” She’s going to realize that she is a whole person just on her own, and that the goal of her life doesn’t have to be finding a partner, and we can’t have that can we?”
^This! ❤️
Lynne Nieman says
Oh Kristin … I just love this. It’s getting a share for sure. All those things that I’m not supposed to be or become, I have proudly become. Great post!!
Kristin says
Girl power!
Carmen Pinto says
When my daughter decided to go to university in South Korea, some friends thought my husband and I were mad for letting her go….better yet, encouraging her to go. She’s in her third year and traveling everywhere, many times alone. When people ask, “aren’t you afraid?” “Isn’t Korea dangerous?” My response is always,”it’s safer than here.”
When I read this post, I felt validated. I emailed it to her as an encouragement. Thank you for doing this. It’s inspiring. I hope it spreads like wildfire!! Let the revolution begin.
Kristin says
I’m so glad that you felt validated by this post! Some parents aren’t very happy with me for encouraging their daughters to travel alone. You gave her an incredible gift by being so supportive!
GG says
I have a family friend whose daughter was a little lost in what she wanted to do with life. Then in college she had the urge to travel to Asia at the shock of her parents (they really didn’t have the money either). She raised the money herself and went by herself to China, Korea, and Japan and it gave her focus and purpose in life. It was then extended to a travel abroad experience. She decided to major in Asian studies, learned Japanese and is now a very happy, and content woman who knows how to cook some fine Japanese dishes! She plans on being a teacher for international students and researching world cultures. The parents are now glad she went to say the least so more power to you both! It’s funny, I think she made more friends going alone than if she went with somebody. If this happened to a family friend down the street (and possibly another case in the future closer to home), I can’t imagine the inspiration it could have for so many women (and young men too) around the world!
Kristin says
That’s amazing. Good for her!
Par says
I don’t have the courage in traveling alone cause there are so many weirdo out there.
Kristin says
I don’t feel like there are any more or any fewer weirdos whether I’m alone or with others to be honest.
Julie Marx says
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Nothing to add, just a big fat yes to each and every one of them. Sharing, pinning, spreading this!
Kristin says
<3 <3 <3
Stefanie says
Thank you! I agree with so much of this.
My favorite one:
“She’s going to realize that she is a whole person just on her own, and that the goal of her life doesn’t have to be finding a partner, and we can’t have that can we?”
My goal in life is collecting as many great memories as I can and so far that has worked out fine.
Kristin says
Same!
Michelle Selleck says
Funny after a month travelling solo in SE Asia and with the threat of redundancy looming when I return to the UK I am considering starting up my own cat cafe with cats from local rescues who people can come and interact with and maybe adopt to their forever homes.
Neil says
Oh yeh, great article. In fairy land. The truth is in the news. Two girls in Morocco decapitated. THAT is the reality of females travelling alone these days. Your article fills girls with a false sense of security. You are sending them to their death.
Kristin says
Oh please, Neil. Because women never have problems if they just stay at home and never leave. Nothing ever happens to women in the US, ever.
tonysam says
“Women should never travel alone without some man to ‘protect’ them.” Family members are usually the worst offenders with this kind of “advice.” Statistically, women are in far, far, far more danger living with or dating a man than a stranger. Women don’t need other people to be able to travel. Women, like all other travelers, need to know the pitfalls of traveling solo and plan well ahead of time. I personally prefer a travel group because I don’t have to worry about the headache of where my meals come from or where to stay plus I don’t have to map out an itinerary, but I have planned trips on my own and had a great time.
Kristin says
Wow.. i’ve recently been having a lot of doubts for my trip in to south east asia for 3 months. Everyone i asked said why? They all told me i won’t make it back (half joking way). I know there will be times where i will get uncomfortable and scared but really thank you for this post, you have given me more confidence than ever and i’m once again excited for the new adventure that awaits.
Kristin says
Great because you WILL have an amazing adventure and you deserve it!
Hansani says
This is amazing!!! But I need to add something here. There are dangers out there confined to women. It’s a human right to ask for more punishable and a validated law against it which ensures her safety even more.
Obviously not being able to travel alone hinders her growth and confidence which is a tremendous loss to her life. And thank you so much again for this post! I’m spreading it.
Madilynn says
i love this. i’m freshly 18 and going to europe for a week almost completely alone and this makes me so much more excited.
Kristin says
Yay! Have a blast!
Nikki says
Personally, I feel better traveling with someone. I don’t see it as hindering my rights or my growth as a woman. Women should be able to live how they would like and experience life in their terms. But I feel safe with a companion. I don’t see the world as scary place, but the reality of the world is that there are situations where men are out to do women harm. I personally would rather play it safe and still enjoy travel.
Rebekka says
My cousin honestly doesn’t even get to go alone to the local shops. Her family, who since birth was a family of all males and still is to this day, never lets her walk alone but would let the brothers two older and one younger walk alone. Despite now being at an age where she CAN go out walking alone to the local shops, without having to ask, and anywhere else will forever be a definite no because of the families reactions. They never even taught her to drive, have her away from internet (to learn public transportation), no phone, stopped sending her to school at age 10 and not educating her any further (and that wasn’t mega long ago), among a lot more.
I don’t live anywhere near to help with that, so not much I can do..
Kristin says
Ugh that’s too bad. I am sure their intent is good but it probably kills any self agency she might have.
Bridget says
Hi!
All of your points are great and make me want to travel the world even more. I have been told by many people that where I want to go is too dangerous though especially for a female all alone. As a future female solo traveler, I want my first trip to be Northern India. I have always been interested in the culture, history, and religion. I know you haven’t been to India yet, but is there any tips you can give me or suggest me to another female solo traveler who has gone to India.
Kristin says
Yes check out hippieinheels.com
Victoria says
Brilliant! Just brilliant… ❤️
Kristin says
<3
Shelby Fisher says
This is bullshit. Women don’t travel alone because they’re afraid of getting raped and murdered. It’s not a good idea for women to travel alone. It’s a thing. Why do you think there are so many missing/dead women?
Kristin says
I’m a statistics and numbers person when it comes to this. Women go missing and get assaulted at home ALL THE TIME. It’s not a traveling thing, unfortunately it’s a being a woman thing. Bad things happen at home just as much if not more than on the road. I’ve done a lot of research into this and while the media really plays it up when women go missing when they travel, it’s a rarity. I’ve been traveling solo for over a decade and have had amazing experiences.